Sunday, January 21, 2018

Self Care Sunday | I'm Happy With Who I am These Days

Happy Self Care Sunday!  I wanted to provide an update from my last Self Care Sunday Post - Live Your Truth in October, 2017.  Never in a million years that I could fathom that I would be sharing something so personal about myself online.  However when I changed my company name from Opulent Couturier to Andrea Latrice Style, I made a promise to myself to show more vulnerability and transparency in my business so that my clients could get to know me.  I am a very private person so this is stretching me in ways that you could not even imagine.  Its making me better and more in sync with what fuels me and brings me joy. This has also fostered some great conversation with online friends that have opened up to me.  I am grateful.

In my last post Live Your Truth, I shared my experience from the very beginning of my journey of dealing with some unsettled family communication with dealing with my biological fathers suicide & dealing with stress.  Today I want to share what steps I have taken to move past it and continue on with my life.  This was one of the hardest things that I had to deal with in 2017 and now looking back, I can say that its made me stronger in knowing that when I do have a family of my own  that  open communication will be front and center.  This is a hot button especially in the African American community of keeping "family secrets at a hush" or that "Mysterious Play Uncle or Auntie" that just shows up at the family functions.  LOL...I digress.

Step 1:  Dealing with Anxiety 

In dealing with the bottled up grief from the past 37 years I would have never have imagined that I would be dealing with anxiety.  When you don't talk about things and just allow them to lay dormant for years, baby when you open that can it brings out so many things that you could least expect.  In transparency I have dealt with so many of these things (above) over the last few months in 2017.  It was not fun nor was it pretty but I am on the other side.   Being an  introvert and quiet person until you get to know me, this caused me to tuck myself away in my own little cocoon.  I was a functioning business woman struggling with anxiety.  Day to day if you saw me you could never tell it  (well maybe if you really knew me some could tell) but on the regular it was business as usual.  When I came home I went back into my shell of being in my thoughts and feelings.  Its not something that I want to deal with ever again but now that I know what triggers these attacks, I know how to deal with them before it becomes overbearing.  

Step 2.  Finding a Good Counselor/Therapist 

There is a stigma especially in the African American community that we need to take all of our problems to the Lord (or your higher power).  I firmly believe that God blesses individuals to step in on the earth to help those that are in need of support.  Yes you can talk to your girlfriends & family but sometimes things need to go a step further.  I am thankful that I found my Counselor when I did, she is pretty amazing and I have referred her to several people especially over the holidays.  I have to be real, counseling was very challenging because it forced me to confront and think about a lot of things in a different way.  My Counselor always gave me "homework/or held me accountable to deadlines" of when I would do certain things.  It helped a lot but man did I procrastinate on somethings that I wasn't ready to address.  

I discovered this link and maybe this will help you if you are feeling like you need to talk to someone about things going on in your life.  Whether its work stress, social pressures, family issues, etc. it helps to have an unbiased voice of reason.  I researched the website directory Therapy for Black Girls for Counselors in my area.  

Step 3.  Treating Anxiety

Once it was determined that I was dealing with anxiety and some depression I was determined that I WAS NOT GOING ON ANY PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION.  I had read too many bad things online about side effects, etc.  I was adamant if I needed something to level me off, that it would be a natural supplement.  After much trial & error and many supplements later I've found my mix that works for me perfectly.  Its not something that I take daily only when I feel anxiety creeping up on me.  These supplements work literally within 15-30  minutes of taking them.  

Anxiety Supplement - Calm Now

Focus & Clarity - Neuro Peak

Let's face it we all have trouble focusing at times & when I have those days this supplement helps tremendously.  I especially take this one when I travel because road & air travel, you have to be on your A game for sure!  

I recently was recommended to this Vitamin B8 Supplement and I have used it  a few times in my morning juice or smoothie.  It has no taste at all but its effective as well.

In closing this has been my journey and I am so thankful for progress.  I don't know why God chose for it to come out at this point in my life but I know that it was for a reason.  I have learned that I am stronger than I think and I am a fighter even when I want to fight solo and decline help from anyone.  Sometimes you have to exercise your own faith in God and not man with their opinions, was it lonely at times, YES but was it worth it now that I am on the other side... YES!  

**Product Links:  I am not affiliated with any of the supplement companies mentioned in this post.  All products were purchased with my own money & not supplied for product review.** 

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